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AITA for refusing to clock out early so my coworker can take her kid to the hospital?

· 4 min read

The Car‑pool Conundrum​

Picture this: five adults, one car, a daily commute that feels like a slow‑motion road trip, and a shared stash of gasoline. That’s us. We’re a tight‑knit crew, living an hour away from the office, so when the company went back to full‑time, we all decided: “Let’s car‑pool and save on gas and tolls.”

Everything was fine—until one of our coworkers, let’s call her S, announced that her little one had turned the bathroom into a nose‑bleed zoo. The kid was so desperate that he’d run through an entire roll of toilet paper just to stop the bleeding. The drama escalated to a hospital visit, and the little guy’s blood‑thirsty nose was apparently life‑or‑death material.

The Nosebleed Nightmare​

The next day, S shows up at work, looking like she’d just survived a minor apocalypse. She keeps her story to herself until we’re cruising back home. Then she drops the bomb: “I didn’t ask for time off because I didn’t think I’d get it. If I don’t get him seen soon, he could die.” She then proposes a master plan:

  • I’ll drive the usual route with A (our resident chauffeur).
  • S will take the wheel so she can drop us off, then head home straight to the ER.
  • Everyone else will clock out at 4:45 instead of the usual 5:30.

We, the ever‑compassionate drivers, decide to play it safe: we’ll find a different ride in the afternoon, letting S go home early. The plan is simple. We’re all in agreement—until A calls her at night, and the drama hits its peak.

The Angry Response​

She goes from panic to fury in a single conversation. “You’re heartless!” she yells. “What goes around comes around!” She then announces that she’ll reschedule the doctor’s appointment so it “won’t inconvenience us.” Meanwhile, she’s still claiming the child’s nosebleeds could kill him. Classic mismatched priorities.

I’m not the villain here, folks. We’re just two adults with no kids, trying to navigate a coworker’s crisis while keeping the office clock ticking. If I had a bleeding child, I’d call out, not show up and drop the news on the way home.

The Moral Dilemma​

So, is I the A? Are we the villains for not giving our extra 45 minutes? In the grand scheme of life, the answer is a resounding NTA (Not the At). You’re a responsible adult who’s trying to keep the workplace running while also respecting your coworkers’ autonomy. The baby’s life is not on your lunch break.

But let’s not forget that S may have had her own reasons: maybe she wanted moral support, or perhaps she was hoping the collective early exit would get her a green light from management. Either way, it seems she misread the situation, and the drama was a bit over the top.

TL;DR​

A bunch of coworkers tried to help a sick child by offering early exits. One person got mad, the others stayed polite, and the baby’s life is not in our hands. We’re good, and the “morally questionable” mom might just be a big‑hearted over‑dramatic parent. 🚗💨👶

NTA

She has her own car, she can take her own kid when needed.

What do you guys(as coworkers) have anything to do with this? Unless I'm missing something?

I'm equally confused. Does she want everyone to go with her for moral support?

She may want everyone to leave early with her thinking maybe she won’t get into trouble if everyone leaves en masse. There’s no other viable reason for her to act this way.

NTA I genuinely have no idea what her issue is? That’s 2 less people she'd have to worry about driving home so she can get her kid to the hospital sooner?

Also, yeah, I don’t have kids but if something could kill then I'd be calling out of work and rushing them to the ER.

NTA. Her child, her responsibility is the short answer.

But this is weird behavior. What are the chances she's lying? This doesn’t seem like the action of a concerned mother. How expensive is it for her to just drive separately? This makes sense.

NTA. Her child, her responsibility is the short answer.

But this is weird behavior. What are the chances she's lying? This doesn’t seem like the action of a concerned mother. How expensive is it for her to just drive separately? This makes sense.